Defining Success in Your Own Terms

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defining successSuccess means different things to different people. There is absolutely no universal way to measure success. At the end of the day, success is the achievement of one’s goals and honestly, the goals of two people cannot always be the same. It is rarely the same. To some, success is having $100M in the bank, it is having a decent job, and another may define success as having a happy and blissful marriage.

Once you’ve set goals for yourself, achieving those goals means that you’re successful. Earlier this week, Genevieve Nnaji (a renowned Nigerian actress) said something that totally shouldn’t have made people angry. But ding dong! It did. Genevieve is a single mum and has been for more than 20 years. With enough money in her bank account and a crazy successful career, we can all agree that she is career success. But, people didn’t see that as a success. All that was in the comments section was why isn’t she married? Aren’t you ashamed of being a single mum for more than 20 years? Ugh! Where’s her husband?… You get the point.

successOur society has defined being successful in so many different ways. If you have less than $20K in your account, you’re not successful, never mind that your marriage is successful. In society, success for a man is how much he makes and for a woman, it is being married before 30. But just like almost everything else, society has messed up and has missed the point. Society mind you is you and I and probably our ancestors. LOL.

We are the society. It’s us who put weird and strange expectations on ourselves because other members of the society (probably the majority) think it is the way it’s meant to be. We want our definition of success to suit their own, forgetting that our goals aren’t all the same. And when we don’t get around to achieving those goals that aren’t ours, we start feeling miserable. Define success in your terms!

love and acceptanceIf you’ve been on my blog, then you will probably know that I talk so much about love, acceptance and Jesus. Why Jesus? Because He’s the only one who truly accepts and loves us for whatever we are. Society seriously needs to learn to love and accept the different choices of its members. This just means we (you and I) need to respect the different definitions of success.

Two days ago, someone was saying that it is very ‘wrong and unacceptable’ to not want to get married. And I was like, ‘’thank God nobody needs your opinion on whether or not to get married, getting married may or may not mean one is successful, and some don’t think it’s necessary; why would you force that on them?’’ If only we learn to accept the decisions and various definitions of success, then we won’t have a lot of unnecessary discussions.

You there, don’t let society make you feel bad for defining success in your way! Set your goals, work towards achieving them and voila! You are a success.

Also, Read 5 Characteristics of Successful People.

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