Did you know that many relationship problems are actually single problems? That is, the problems you see in your different relationships- romantic or otherwise are actually the problems that you have as an individual.
I remember arguing with two of my friends last year about the fact that marriage can’t change anyone. They said it can, and I said it can’t. We were both wrong. I have met a lot of people since then and have realised that the people you meet can make you want to change (that is, they can be positive/negative influences on you), but that it is actually your personal decision to change.
What that means is that while someone may influence your decision to be better, it’s you who actually drives the car.
Everyone has problems, problems that may have created a void in us. It could be from the abuse one suffered in childhood, or from being bullied, or from the divorce of parents, or from a messy breakup/past relationships etc. It could even be our insecurities that we haven’t dealt with (everyone has insecurities).
So many times, we try to pretend that there is no void (which will definitely be obvious along the way), while other times we want someone else to fill that void. Please hear me loud and clear: NO ONE CAN FILL YOU UP!
What are the strings? They are your insecurities, your fear, your reaction to things, your defence mechanisms, etc. The truth is that all these strings are attached to you. In fact, they are a part of you and will remain so except you break up with them.
These strings are the reasons for most problems in your relationships with people. So, even if you are in a no-strings-attached relationship, your strings will still be attached to you.
HOW TO BREAK STRINGS
1) Be conscious of them
2) Grow your spiritual life
3) Stay away from negativity
4) Do away with negative defence mechanisms; for example, if you are the type to run away when things get tough in your relationships, start learning to sit through and talk about the problem.
5) If someone abused or hurt you in the past, try as much as possible to forgive. Forgiving someone is freeing.
Your strings are always attached to you. They follow you out of your relationship and into another. They have the power to mess up your relationships with people so please, break them off of you.
Please drop your comments below! I would love to hear from you. Also, share to friends!
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